These days, these days

So the dude with the slides said that it would be about a ten day gig cuz we had four jobs, but after the second job, he said we were done because the latter two jobs were just small jobs and he only needed two people. He originally called it a “two-man job,” but then he was like “or I should say a two person job, because you’re as good as any man” (that’s right, I killed it (before it killed me)) and at first I was very flattered by the compliment and now I’m starting to think it’s because of the haircut…

but anyway, now I’m in that really fun phase of life calledddd–

JOBHUNTIN

I know I made that the color of the rainbow, but be assured: there is nothing gay about this job hunt (both meanings intended).

Sidenote: that “N” is actually the color called indigo. I never really knew which color indigo was, but now I do. I’m kinda disappointed? it sounds like a much more exotic color.

SO BASICALLY my days consist of playing the guitar (because I’ve decided to stop being content in my lameness and actually develop my talents) and looking all over Indeed and Craigslist (among other sites) to try and land myself a sweet gig. I was holding out for a hero to save me, a.k.a. a writing job, because i’m…a writer… but I think I’m going to try the freelance route and get something that pays, because staying in bed all day does NOT. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t considered organ/whatever-I-don’t-need donation so I can stay lazy and be rich, but… I’m a pansy. Also, I’m not quite that desperate. Soon, though. Maybe.

I’ve also been spending a lot of my time trying to convince the two-year-old that lives with me (nephew) that he doesn’t need to run away crying every time he sees my face while simultaneously trying to convince his cousin (the five-year-old that I love so dearly) that the earth does not revolve around her and while I definitely love her, I also need validation from that two year old. Minimal progress is being made.

But back to the gayless job hunt. Since a picture is worth a thousand words, here are three:

 

So the first one, as you can see, searches for writer and returns… a plumbing job? I’m not quite ready to wear my pants that low yet, Indeed. but thanks? I think?

In the second picture, some person on April 8th thought they would take to Craigslist to find a… marijuana dealer? Like, maybe I should have clicked on it because I have so many questions, but is that even legal? Welcome to Colorado, glad to be back.

The third picture, however, is the real winner. It wants me to teach children how to play the…eukellee. I think they’ve discovered a new instrument. But hey it sounded like a cool gig so I decided to email the lady about and I don’t really know much about it like at all but I HAVE AN INTERVIEW ON WEDNESDAY. And if I don’t get to teach kids how to play the eukellee, maybe I can teach them how to spell ukulele. We’ll see. To be fair, it’s probably just as hard to spell it as it is to play it.

 

And that’s where the heckfest is at these days, folks. Thanks for tuning in.

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